Wednesday, July 15, 2015

THE perfect curtains


We have been here in Texas for 33 days. And the number one question I have been asked during this time has been "how are you doing?"  And mostly I can answer with an honest "GOOD". The kids are adjusting well....now that they finally know simple things like where the bathroom is located in our house and have differentiated between the front door and the back door. Life is pretty good for them. We've even managed to fall into somewhat of a rhythm with our days. And Joe is enjoying his work at the hospital. It's not without its challenges obviously but he's learning and gaining confidence in his brand new doctor role. And me? Well I was doing well. Enjoying setting up our new home. Exploring our new town. Meeting the other residents' families. Finding my new Texas groove.  But today, day 33, it hit me. 

I'm lonely. 

I want a friend. A true friend. Not just acquaintances. (The other residents' wives have been fabulous...really! But...) I want to be known and to know someone well. I want to tell a story without having to give a detailed backstory so that it makes sense. I want to be with people that I know enjoy my company. People that I know for sure are not annoyed by my children. Or even if they are annoyed they still love us. I want to have someone I can call up for no reason. Or have over to my house and not feel the need to apologize for the constant mess that is our home. 

I want a friend. 

And I know (from past experience) that I will make a friend...eventually. But right now it feels like it is never going to happen. Because it's hard meeting new people and forging new friendships. It takes time and work. It takes a whole lot of "this is me. Who are you?" conversations. And "I have these quirks, habits, preferences and beliefs. So how about you? What are your quirks, habits, preferences and beliefs?" interactions. Until you find just the right match. 

So until then I'll just keep on keepin' on. Which these days looks a lot like searching like a mad woman (online and in stores) for THE perfect curtains for our living room. As I type this I have four different curtains hanging on my two living room windows. Because clearly the correct drapes will make everything better! Kidding. It won't fix anything really. Except making my house prettier. And that's gotta count for something, right?

2 comments:

  1. You are doing such a great job with your house and with shouldering all the responsibility and weight of being a "single mom" while your husband is in residency. I will pray that God fills that friend-sized hole in your heart. Definitely been there! Hang in there!

    Heidi

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    1. Thank you Heidi! I so very appreciate your kind words and prayers. I don't feel like I'm doing a good job but we are all still alive and (mostly) happy so I must be doing something right:)

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