How a blog dies.

I love reading. I have ever since the third grade. However over the last few years my reading for fun has dwindled to nearly non-existent. In fact most of my reading consists of reading blogs on my phone. Dozens of blogs. Mostly mom blogs. Funny kid stories. Real life struggles. Just the happenings of a family. Much like this here blog of mine. And over the years I have watched more than a few blogs die. Sometimes it's a slow drug out process other times it's sudden. Without warning. Either way it ends, I'm always left wondering WHY?!? Where did they go? What happened?!? Did something tragic happen?

And now sadly I fear I am that blogger. The one with the blog circling the drain. And here's the thing, there is no good reason. Nothing big or dramatic or life changing has happened. We are still here living life. And I certainly have plenty I WANT to record. For example how Isaiah very seriously asked me what kind of food I thought they served at the "Human Express" as we drove past the "Hunan Express" awhile back. Or how Levi is suddenly mobile and can army crawl across the room like its no big deal! Or how I left the kids + a neighbor boy in the backyard the other day and by the time I threw in one load of laundry Hannah had turned on the hose and had all the kids trapped in/on the playhouse. She was holding all the big kids hostage! (To say she is a handful is a major understatement.) Or how Charlotte had a small potty accident on the third day of kindergarten and it took every ounce of my self restraint to NOT drive over there and scoop her up and bring her home. And when the nurse told me over the phone that Charlotte was crying and dressed in the school's extra clothes and looked like a HOBO, my heart broke for her and I cried too. 

However I can't seem to find the time to record these things or the dozens of other moments I don't want to forget either. Because when I can't find the time to mop my floors once a week...I can't justify using any "extra" time to write. (For the record I scrubbed the kitchen floor this morning. It's hard to tell because it's still sticky and blotchy. But I promise I attempted to clean it before writing this.) 

Maybe this is the end. Maybe not. I sure hope not! But I really don't know. I want to write. In fact I have half a dozen drafts started but none completed. But first I have to figure out how to balance this life I'm living. How to juggle four kids (two of whom are in school...but not the same school!), a husband in residency and maintaining our home and sanity. And right now I'm not doing a very good job at any of those things. I can't seem to complete a load of laundry in under 48 hours meanwhile Joe is working crazy hospital hours + knocking dozens of house projects off his list every chance he gets! His last day off he managed to install three new ceiling fans in our house (without electrocuting himself!). I on the other hand made it to Walmart and purchased 3 of the 6 items I needed that same day. Like I said, I don't quite have it figured out yet. 

So until I do, this is me saying GOODBYE. It's been good. I hope to be back. But I make no promises. 

Time of death 14:32.