What LOVE looks like.

Being Valentine's day and all I spent some time very early this morning (thanks to a never ending nursing session) thinking about what love looks like to me these days. (To clarify...by "these days" I mean nearly 12 years into marriage and 2 weeks into life with our fourth child).

And this is it...

It's 12:07 AM being nudged awake to feed the crying baby (because otherwise I would just keep on sleeping...sorry baby!)

It's 2:13 AM waking up to my husband putting the baby back in the bassinet because I fell asleep nursing in my rocking chair yet again. And being able to crawl back into my warm bed and snuggle up to my husband for a couple hours (hopefully!). 

It's 5:02 AM and I can't get the baby to sleep and I could cry from exhaustion and my husband quietly without saying a word gets up and takes baby out of our room so I can sleep. Because 5 am is an acceptable wake-up time in his world (and not mine!) This happens EVERY day. 

It's 7:03 AM and I am sleeping soundly because my husband is up with all the kids. Feeding them breakfast and getting them ready for the day. 

It's 8 AM and baby is delivered to me for his next feeding along with breakfast in bed. Eggs and toast and fruit and yogurt (or something similar). This also happens EVERY day.

It's 9:05 AM I'm still in bed and my husband is rushing our eldest out the door and walking him to the bus stop in below zero temperatures. 

It's 10 AM and despite his great dislike for library storytime, my husband is there with both our girls because THEY love it!

It's 1:20 PM preschool drop off is done and now my husband is headed to the grocery store...for the second time this week...because I can't seem to figure out how much food we really need!

It's 3:36 PM when my husband is changing the two year old's naptime diaper which is inevitably poopy:(

It's 5:07 PM the baby is crying and haaangry. Dinner is partially made. Three kids are begging for food. And my husband takes over and finishes making dinner so I can feed the baby. 

It's 8:37 PM and we finally have the big kids in bed (not sleeping yet of course but in bed!) and we finally have a moment to talk just the two of us..even if all we talk about what's on the "schedule" for the next day. 

It's 10:11PM and right before my husband drifts off to sleep (while I nurse the baby again) he tells me I am beautiful...despite the fact that I didn't get a shower today and I am still wearing yesterday's outfit. In spite of the fact that my squishy post partum body holds no resemblance to my body and I am virtual emotional roller coaster he thinks I am beautiful. 

THAT is love. Or at least my current definition of love.